The Cure For Thanksgiving Debauchery (No Abstinence Required)

I don’t know about for you, but Thanksgiving is a day for me when dietary wisdom goes out the window. I’m powerless against the turkey, stuffing, potatoes and gravy, cranberries, dinner roles, candied yams, homemade pies, wine, and the crazy green marshmallow pineapple concoction my mom makes every year.

If you are like me, then this list of symptoms should look awfully familiar:

  • Focal discomfort and fullness in the chest and abdomen.
  • Stomach distention with possible pain.
  • Belching and bloating.
  • Aversion to food and eating.
  • Acid regurgitation, nausea, and possible vomiting.
  • Changes in bowel movements like constipation or diarrhea.

Good news! Help is here for you. The ancient Chinese developed an herbal formula that is tailor made for Thanksgiving dinner (but about 150 years before the first Thanksgiving at Plymouth).

The above list of symptoms is actually the indications for a miracle concoction named Bao He Wan (roughly translated as Preserve Harmony Pill). Bao He Wan is the chief formula in the category of herb combinations to Reduce Food Stagnation.

How It Works

Bao He Wan uses a three-pronged approach to help ease our overindulgence. Four of the herbs in this formula are particularly good to help in the digestion of meats, carbs, dairy, and alcohol respectively. These four also reduce gas and bloating and increase the speed of digestion.

Three of the herbs in the formula specifically help clear the metabolic byproducts of stuffing ourselves well beyond what is reasonable. These byproducts are responsible for the nausea and the phlegmy, heavy, and puffy feeling we experience. And the last herb in the formula reduces the inflammation and “burning sensation” in the stomach that is all too common.

The Protocol

My turkey-day ritual is to take 12 pills (1.5 times the suggested dose on the bottle) one hour before the main feast, 12 pills as I begin eating, and 12 pills 1 hour after eating but before the pie!

You can find Bao He Wan online (non-affiliate), but if you want it for Thanksgiving Day, I suggest tracking it down at a Chinese herb shop, Chinese grocery, or your local acupuncturist’s office.

This formula is safe for the above indications, but if you have a medical condition, are pregnant, or think you may be pregnant, 1) take only under the supervision of an appropriate medical practitioner 2) you shouldn’t be eating like this anyway.

Otherwise, have fun and enjoy the food and the day!

Do you have a remedy that helps ease the ills of stuffing your face? Please leave your comments and questions below!

* These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. These products and statements are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent disease.

Photo by TrickyKid

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7 Responses to “The Cure For Thanksgiving Debauchery (No Abstinence Required)”

  1. Becky says:

    My cousin named the green marshmellow thing green gop salad. So. Good.

  2. Maria says:

    Hi Doug!

    I do have a remedy! It’s as simple as exercise!

    Really, my favorite time for a quick 5-10 minute workout is about 20 min after a meal. At that point I start feeling the heaviness in my stomach, and I hate it.

    So I get up and do any exercise that comes to my mind: squats, lunges, push-ups, you name it.

    After just 5 minutes of exercise the heaviness feeling is greatly reduced.

    Note: I don’t exercise because I feel guilty for eating too much. I do it because it helps my body feel light and vibrant instead of heavy and lethargic.

  3. I feel the same as Maria remarks – I am pro exercise. But sometimes it can’t be a instant remedy, which is a case when it is this special dinner. This is a useful alternative that you stated

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